There are some books which hit you in the soul with its message, there are books which hook you into the plot and there are some books which do both. The true lifespan of The Midnight Library is about three days which was beautifully fitting, given I finished reading it within three days too. Matt Haig has transported his readers across dimensions, time and space throughout this novel.
On the other hand however, I am not sure how great this book would be for anyone suffering depression and experiencing the same pains as our protagonist. To some extent, I think it idealises the 'time' between life and death creating a fantasy that one would be able to reverse their actions. Furthermore, it doesn't really emphasise or mirror the true extent or experience of what someone contemplating suicide is going through. It's a romanticised show and tell of a suicidal ideology where one can turn around and back out of their decision to end their life.
The Midnight Library follows Nora, after she ends her life and comes face to face with an infinite number of lives she could have lived if she had just slightly tweaked some of her major and minor life decisions. As she guides through her regrets, she discovers how one little action or decision could have changed the course of her life entirely. But not every decision resulted in a life of rainbows and joys, as Nora discovers each life comes with its own turmoils, pain and loss.
One of my favourite quotes from the novel:
"Sometimes regrets are just... A load of bullshit." This resonated with me as I sometimes regret and fret over things which I may not know the full story of and rather than growing from it, I spend an extended amount of time overthinking the decision. I am a believer that the universe works in mysterious ways to give us what we need, not necessarily what we want. This novel focuses on how decisions Nora made caused her to be a 'failure' and resulted in her depression and suicide. But what I think the narrative fails to discuss is how depression is an illness and not a choice.
Haig has created a protagonist who has a lot available to her in her life but focuses on her shortcomings which leads to depression and suicide. I don't feel like the alternative lives she visits during her 'time' between life and death contribute to her healing and recovery from her depressive state. There isn't much discussion about help available or even Nora seeking help other than the consumption of antidepressants. To some extent I feel that there is a focus on what good things one may have in their life and this is what brings happiness. Money, family, work, opportunities and fame - these materialistic things are the focus of bringing our protagonist happiness, but in reality, these are privileged things which not everyone has access to in order to resolve their depression. I would have preferred to see Nora overcome her depression through love for herself rather than love for an ideal job, lifestyle or relationship.
I did quite enjoy how Nora's different lives seamlessly intertwined and the sci-fi element of the novel. I liked the subtle focus on the existence of alternate dimensions and inter-dimensional travel. As a bit of a alternate dimension believer myself, I do wish that Haig unpacked the ideas of quantum physics more and discussed more about how the lives which Nora faded in and out of were impacted by her short 'root soul' existence in them.
Overall, I'm on the fence. I enjoyed the read as it was a plot concept which was something new and fresh to me. However, I felt it was lacking in focusing on issues which triggered the depressive and suicidal state. I would also not recommend this book to anyone who is having suicidal or depressive thoughts as I don't feel like this fictitious narrative allows for a reader to truly find any solitude or support.
Completed on: 15th June 2021
Trigger Warning for anyone wishing to read this novel: suicide, loss of parent/s, loss of siblings, drug/alcohol abuse, depression
If you or someone you know is experiencing a difficult time, please contact crisis support or suicide intervention services on 13 11 14
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